i generally have a lot on my mind...whether people choose to believe it or not...and there's one thing that's been bugging me for a while...

alex.

yea, that fat, pin dicked ass hole....

caitlin came up to me the other day and mentioned how you came into the deli and asked paul (apparently very rudely) why she was working...why do you care? you say you don't want shit all to do with us...her in particular...

don't bother trying to win her back...i wouldn't think she'd want to go back to you...but then again, i'm not so sure...

why were you all funny around me the other night? why did you stare (and at who) when cait and i walked out...

i keep wondering if the time we were together was just a joke...to be honest, i don't really care...you were more of a mate than anything, but i mean, when we started hanging out, you were still fooling around with her...but she wasn't giving you what you wanted...so you targeted me instead...you had only one thing in mind when you got with me...and his name is tiny...

you were substituting what you really wanted with me...and that's disgusting...the thought of your name to me now just makes me want to be sick...

sometimes i wonder if we can ever be friends again...i liked us being friends...going out, playing pool having a laugh...but when i actually think about it, you're probably just using me to get close to her again...so lay the fuck off, ok. she's mine now. you've had more than your fair share...

69






for the 69th blog 

so i'm assuming that you have worked out we're together...took you seven months...

but why do you have to be so weird and awkward about it all?

i try treat her well. i try make up for all the mistakes i've made. can't you be happy for her?

she tells me that i make her the happiest she's been in a while...

and you just can't accept a girl-on-girl relationship...

its not like we have a great deal of sex anyway, its more of an emotional relationship...

i wish you could read my blogs...to know how i feel about her...to know that the mistakes i've made, i dont take lightly...

i care about your daughter so fucking much...

i don't wanna lose her...she makes me happy...she gives me a reason to live my life...she's been so amazing to me...supported me when i needed it...given me a shoulder to cry on...been the one i've vented to...

she completes me and i wish you could see it....

but that's alright...

not like you care...

rEiGnItInG tHe SpArK

isn't it beautiful?

i haven't blogged in ages...and quite a bit seems to have changed...i think?
for one, i'm that much closer to turning 18!!! i finally have a job...and at maccas none the less, but hey, i'm enjoying it and it pays for everything...and the best part of everything?? i've been with my gorgeous for nearly 7 months now!! :)


ahh, things are finally looking up in life...still need to get my licence and stuff...but i don't think i'm ready yet...i just dont want to feel like i'm letting my mum down with not using those free lessons...but i really dont feel ready....




oh well....

That time it snowed in Wellington...

...well, it was pretty gay...

...the snow in Lower Hutt didn't settle...